Alright, moms, I need advice. My Miss O has the sweetest spirit, and she loves to make other people happy. When she is playing with a toy or has something Little Bean wants, if he complains, next thing you know she is giving up her toy without having enjoyed it yet, saying she wants to make him happy. Or the other day, Little Bean got in trouble and wasn't allowed on the couch (since he was jumping on it or some such thing). When bedtime story time came, I asked Little Bean to sit on the floor since he wasn't allowed on the couch. Of course he complained, and so Miss O, wanting him to be happy chose to sit on the floor too. This of course took away the punishment aspect of sitting on the floor because if both of them are doing it, it ceases to be a punishment and becomes normal.
I love her sweet personality, how she is always thinking of ways to make others more comfortable and happy. But unfortunately, Little Bean is not like that at all. He is a very typical child, always looking out for himself, and hoarding toys and opportunities for himself. Sharing and compassion do not come naturally to him at all. If anything, he is a bit of an instigator. At every turn he takes the chance to annoy Miss O, take her things when she isn't looking, etc.
I feel bad for Miss O, and it's hard to teach Little Bean a lesson by making him share because if he whines enough, Miss O will say something like, "It's okay, Little Bean can have it because I know that will make him happy". On the one hand, I want Little Bean to learn to share and be kind, but on the other hand, I want to continue to foster Miss O's generosity. I don't want to inadvertently turn her into a hoarding, non-sharing child either by making her demand fairness in every situation, if that makes sense. She does get mad when he constantly pesters her, and she'll say that she isn't going to play with him anymore, but then moments later she has forgiven and is playing with him again, which doesn't teach him that there are consequences to not treating people nicely.
So, what do I do? How do I help Little Bean learn to share and be kind if Miss O is constantly mending fences when I want him to feel the consequences of his actions (which are so often against Miss O)? I'm really at a loss here...