Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Had my baby, need advice!

I'm going to try to make this quick! Some of you may remember, I was pregnant with a little baby girl. She was born on March 31st! She was 7 pounds 6 ounces, and appeared to be very healthy. We took her home on April 1st. On April 2nd, she stopped breathing and turned blue. It Was the scariest day of my life. I called 911, and she was admitted to the children's hospital here. Long story short, we don't have any results yet, but she was sent home on a cardiac and respiratory monitor. It's a little machine that plugs into the wall and has cords attached to her to monitor periods of apnea. It's not real portable, so basically when I am tending to her, I have to be in one place, I can't just carry her around or use a sling or what not.

You may also remember that I have my two olders, ages 5 and 7 and our foster baby (who is most likely going to adoption) who is 7 months old. Our foster baby is not mobile, and is developmentally delayed, so she still needs a lot of attention. And of course, we homeschool. We are on break right now, of course, but we can't be on break forever...

So, I'm breastfeeding. I was not sure I wanted to at first because I knew it was so much more work than bottle feeding (that's my opinion, especially when you have another infant already bottle-feeding, what's one more?!). But I am, and I'm finding it hard to continue because it's so time consuming and because she pretty much has to stay in one place. I have a hard time occupying my 7 month old when breastfeeding for so long. On the other hand, I don't want to feel guilty for quitting either.

What do you all think? Is it realistic to continue? Can I homeschool, take care of a 7 month old, and breastfeed a child on an apnea monitor? And if so, how do I do it all?? Help!

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Sharon said...

God Bless you!
It is very difficult (for me) to nurse a newborn because it takes so long and having to sit still for that long when every other lump and bump (whether it is alive or not) is calling for you.
You have A LOT on your plate. Give yourself some slack and give yourself permission to stop nursing. Unfortunately there are times when we have to make sacrifices to make things work more smoothly. This sounds like one of those times.
Please also know, I do promote nursing. It is the best option. But I also try to think about it soberly. Being a homeschool mom, you know that we have to be flexible and do what is best for that time and situation.
Hang in there. Keep us posted.
Praying for you.

Angela said...

Oh my! I would stop. I whole heartily advocate breastfeeding, and currently BF my baby (who is not so much a baby anymore), but I am also a realist. You have a lot going on. By now she has had a week or more of BM, and that is great! You do not need to feel guilty for stopping. If there were ever a real reason to stop, this would be it. DO NOT FEEL GUILTY. As with anything, I would pray and ask God to guide me. I will be in prayer for your precious family.

Noteable Scraps said...

I agree with Sharon. Breast-feeding is a very good thing and probably the best option when there are not hindrances making it almost impossible. I had to stop breast-feeding due to a medical condition that I will not go into detail about on the world-wide-web, but suffice it to say that my 4 children have all been bottle-fed and I've gotten a lot of flack for it from well-meaning friends who think there is no other way than breast-feeding. But my doctor reminded me that it could not be the best for my baby when it meant I couldn't be a healthy mommy for him! Since my brother and I were both adopted and bottle-fed, I didn't think it would hinder my kids too much, and it hasn't. They have healthy immune systems, get excellent grades, and my husband has always said that as far as attachment parenting goes, it is a good thing my children were not breast-fed, because if they were any MORE attached to me than they are, I'd just be dragging them around hanging off me 24/7!! (I was anyway for a while!) So if you really want to try to keep breast-feeding, do by all my means. But if you and your kiddos would be better off if you stopped, don't let yourself feel guilty about it. Do what's best for YOUR family!

Noteable Scraps said...

Another plus is that bottle-feeding allows Daddy, grandparents if they are around, and older siblings if they are old enough, to also have some bonding time with the baby while giving you a break. My husband, who was often deployed when my kids were little, treasured this time with our babies when he was home. :)

Michelle said...

First, congratulations!!!

Second, can you do BOTH? If you continue to breastfeed, you can give her the benefits of breast milk (sounds like she may need it), but you can also give her a bottle when you need a break! I breast and bottle fed Malachi starting at 7 days old and he never got nipple confusion. I got a double breast pump from WIC and pumped once a day for 15 minutes. You can always supplement with formula if you need to. Then go as long as you can. You don't have to decide right away if you do both!

that TOPS lady said...

It is totally YOUR decision! Go with your gut and what YOU feel is best considering the situation!

You rock, either way. :)

I just wanted to throw in some advice concerning the apnea monitor: My baby came home on at apnea monitor AND a feeding tube on continuous drip. It was impossible just pick her and and walk anywhere. This is what saved us: A baby stroller that will sit up OR lie all the way flat (and midway in between) with a LARGE storage area under it to hold the monitors and stuff. It made her so much more mobile!

I'm hoping they find some answers soon for your little one.

~God bless~

Sew Lovins said...

Keep breast feeding! Maybe you could pump or something. Sorry to hear you have your handsso fullbest of luck

Annette {This Simple Home} said...

OH!!! Congratulations!

M also appeared healthy...until 17 days and cardiac arrest...

How is she doing now??

As for nursing advice, I think it would be too much for ME to bottle feed one, pump/nurse/bottle feed two children.

I think if you are questioning nursing along with the given circumstances, you might at least try bottle feeding at certain times of the day.

Hugs to you!

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